“The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.” Ain’t that the truth! It is easy to be critical of people. I should know, I used to be a very critical person. Changing a character trait like criticism is not easy but here are three steps I took to look at people more positively.
1. Dirty Jobs-When I was younger, I had a lot of different jobs. I worked in a bakery (cleaning) restaurant (waitress), convenience store (clerk), fast food, library, and a caretaker. I never really minded the jobs and always learned something from them. I learned a lot about people. I became aware of everyone’s jobs and how it looked easy when you are watching but when you are actually doing something it is a lot harder. When I became an administrator, I would step into jobs for people and gain a new appreciation for them. Their work is important. By doing things you never thought you would do, it opens your eyes to the importance of other people’s careers and lives.
2. Being Grateful-It is hard to be critical and negative when you are looking for the “good” in your life. I began keeping a gratitude journal when I was in my thirties. It became such a habit in my life that I don’t need to it write down anymore. I naturally think of the things that are gratifying in my life. When I start to put others down, criticize too much, or feel down because things aren’t going my way, I start to journal again about what I am grateful for and it gives me a new perspective.
3. Reading Fiction-Rarely do I read fiction “just because” or for enjoyment. I read to better understand people and their situations. I want to read a good story, about a person who works through a difficult situation, and learns how to improve their life. This can be heavy stuff! After I read a book, I reflect about what it taught me about the people in the situation. How can I help people in this situation? Who do I know in this situation? Can they learn something from reading this book too? Fiction makes me a kinder, more empathetic person.
One of my favorite sayings is:
This mantra changed my life. When I start feeling critical, I say it to myself. It helps me not become a more non-judgmental person.
1. Dirty Jobs-When I was younger, I had a lot of different jobs. I worked in a bakery (cleaning) restaurant (waitress), convenience store (clerk), fast food, library, and a caretaker. I never really minded the jobs and always learned something from them. I learned a lot about people. I became aware of everyone’s jobs and how it looked easy when you are watching but when you are actually doing something it is a lot harder. When I became an administrator, I would step into jobs for people and gain a new appreciation for them. Their work is important. By doing things you never thought you would do, it opens your eyes to the importance of other people’s careers and lives.
2. Being Grateful-It is hard to be critical and negative when you are looking for the “good” in your life. I began keeping a gratitude journal when I was in my thirties. It became such a habit in my life that I don’t need to it write down anymore. I naturally think of the things that are gratifying in my life. When I start to put others down, criticize too much, or feel down because things aren’t going my way, I start to journal again about what I am grateful for and it gives me a new perspective.
3. Reading Fiction-Rarely do I read fiction “just because” or for enjoyment. I read to better understand people and their situations. I want to read a good story, about a person who works through a difficult situation, and learns how to improve their life. This can be heavy stuff! After I read a book, I reflect about what it taught me about the people in the situation. How can I help people in this situation? Who do I know in this situation? Can they learn something from reading this book too? Fiction makes me a kinder, more empathetic person.
One of my favorite sayings is:
This mantra changed my life. When I start feeling critical, I say it to myself. It helps me not become a more non-judgmental person.
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